You live, you learn

I had a morning coffee break with Karin yesterday, during which I brought her up-to-date on the status of my Aunt's health. (Declining as expected, with significantly crappy days and other "fairly stable" ones.)

At some point during our 90 minutes together, I mentioned my Aunt was educated as both a surgeon and a lawyer, and Karin stopped me. "Ya' know what I think is kind of amazing ?", she asked. "Nope, tell me" I responded as I slurped my mocha. "I think that my learning this after us being friends for no less than 30 years is rather unbelievable. Most friends, I would guess, never know about such things regarding their friends' various relatives." She waited for a beat or two. "But with us ... I mean, we really HAVE known each other since we were 5. Most folks would probably find it kind of strange that I'm *still* learning things about your family at all ... but, because I've known you since we were 5, I also know that there are probably things that I'll learn about you when we're 70."

As she said this, I recognized it not as a complaint, but as an observation. Though we grew up together, our families, homes, and informal educations were vastly different. She made an active decision to be more outgoing sometime during junior high school, right around the time I started to become even more protective of myself. Knowing her, as I do, she'll never ask for the details that I occasionally drop off about things and knowing me, as she does, she knows that I'll share details only when I'm comfortible in doing so. We each know this is not done in judgement - it's just how we both are.

We've never discussed, in depth anyway, our political, religious, or financial differences, which I'm certain we have. There was a time when we listened to the same radio stations, watched similar shows or movies, read the same authors, etc. Now we share quizzical facial expressions - she when I make a Two And A Half Men reference, me when she knows the lyrics to a song on Radio Disney.

Happily we still have - and always will have - enough common ground for the foundation of our friendship. She is my (and I am her) "oldest friend" ... to which she always says "not 'old' as in 'age'" and I always laugh with a response like "mmmhmm - you're outta the will, Junior". Plus, we don't live in the past, though we do share it, and we continue to learn from it ... which makes for a more interesting future anyway.