This past weekend, I received an unexpected knock on my door. I opened it to find a grown up and two young kids (I'm guessing "Dad" with "son" and "son's bestest friend who son HAD to have with him or he wouldn't go with Dad".)
"Dad" was trying to educate folks on an upcoming ballot initiative in my county - and I suppose since it had to do with the education of the younger portion of the population (K-12), bringing along the youngsters was a good move. I mean ... are ya' gonna say "no! I'm against education and the arts! No field trips anymore - more math pop quizzes and history exams!" when there's two sets of little kiddo eyes lookin' right at ya'? Of course you aren't. You're gonna do the responsible adult thing - ask how the funds will be raised, ask who gets to decide the distribution of said funds, ask who is opposing the initiative and based on what arguments ...
And what I noticed while this conversation was going on between "Dad" and I was how calm and controlled the boys were being. They weren't tugging on him, they weren't plugged into any sort of music, they weren't running about ... they seemed to be genuinely listening to our exchange, and I was very impressed. If this was an example of kids *on* art, I was all for it.
I asked "Dad" if my voting for a tax that I wouldn't have to pay since I'm not landowner in this county didn't seem a bit unfair. And "Dad" responded by saying that while I wouldn't be paying the tax, I would receive the benefits of having children in my neighborhood who understood the value of art ... of music ... of culture and that if I was pro that, I could do my part by backing those programs in the community. And, let me add too that "Dad" said this in a way that wasn't the least bit condescending or judgemental. At the end of our conversation, "son's bestest friend who son HAD to have with him or he wouldn't go with Dad" handed me a small slip of paper that outlined the information we'd discussed, "son" reminded me to recycle the paper after the election and everyone wished each other a good day. It was probably the nicest political conversation I've had in a year.
I bring all this up because I just got a call on my cellular phone. It was a recording by an official whose name and title was rattled off wicked fast and sans any emotion and the next 75 seconds (I checked my cell phone record) was an uninspired and unemotional demand (not request - a demand) that this same measure on the ballot be defeated for reasons that I would have questions about - if I'd been given the chance to ask. The call concluded with a url to a website being recited so quickly that I couldn't even type it out on my keyboard fast enough to catch it.
Will I vote to pass the initiative based solely on either of these experiences? No, but I'm sure gonna have a pretty big bias as I read through the details.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Spring Things
Brightly colored flowers.
Lemonade.
New jammies.
Kitties high on catnip at 3am who wake you while they have a bad case of the rips.
Baby birds who are still learning their songs.
Sitting in the sun and reading a book at 6pm.
Neighbors spending time getting their yards back in shape.
Warm slow sunrises and bright full moons.
The first fresh ripe berry of the season.
And, let's be real, marshmallow peeps.
Sooooo ... what are your favorite things about this time of year?
Lemonade.
New jammies.
Kitties high on catnip at 3am who wake you while they have a bad case of the rips.
Baby birds who are still learning their songs.
Sitting in the sun and reading a book at 6pm.
Neighbors spending time getting their yards back in shape.
Warm slow sunrises and bright full moons.
The first fresh ripe berry of the season.
And, let's be real, marshmallow peeps.
Sooooo ... what are your favorite things about this time of year?
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Silly Rabbit Makes Happy Pretty Cow Juice
After having a few conversations that didn't go so well and feeling a little down on myself, I decided to take a break today ... to GIVE myself a break today. I've been having a craving for a week or so for a particular cookie and all attempts to forget the craving have been unsuccessful.
"Come on", I told the roommate. "Jake & I are going comfort grocery shopping for crap that's no good for us. You can help."
It's been really great outside this past week - I think the temperatures even topped 70 - so I took the opportunity to shake the dust off, turn the stereo up and shop like I was 14. Oh it was just awful - for every ripe bell pepper or perfect head of lettuce purchased, there was a box of Junior Mints or a bag of Sour Watermelon candies. Each time something even remotely good for us went into the cart, something awful joined it.
And it was as we walked past the cereals and I said "get something with marshmallows in it or that has chocolate in the name" that finally raised a flag, I guess. "You don't mean that", he said. "There's some Rice Chex - or hey - they have Grape Nuts". *sigh* "Sure, you're right. Go ahead" I agreed as he tossed in some sort of grown up cereal into the basket.
It was as we unloaded the bag that he saw the giant box of Trix cereal. "Hey - what the hell happened here?"
"It's ... more spring-like than Grape Nuts. It'll make the milk all pretty" I countered.
That may just be the most lame excuse I've ever heard for eating like this. *munch* *munch* But gosh this is just delicious. And look - pretty milk. Must be from all the happy cows.
"Come on", I told the roommate. "Jake & I are going comfort grocery shopping for crap that's no good for us. You can help."
It's been really great outside this past week - I think the temperatures even topped 70 - so I took the opportunity to shake the dust off, turn the stereo up and shop like I was 14. Oh it was just awful - for every ripe bell pepper or perfect head of lettuce purchased, there was a box of Junior Mints or a bag of Sour Watermelon candies. Each time something even remotely good for us went into the cart, something awful joined it.
And it was as we walked past the cereals and I said "get something with marshmallows in it or that has chocolate in the name" that finally raised a flag, I guess. "You don't mean that", he said. "There's some Rice Chex - or hey - they have Grape Nuts". *sigh* "Sure, you're right. Go ahead" I agreed as he tossed in some sort of grown up cereal into the basket.
It was as we unloaded the bag that he saw the giant box of Trix cereal. "Hey - what the hell happened here?"
"It's ... more spring-like than Grape Nuts. It'll make the milk all pretty" I countered.
That may just be the most lame excuse I've ever heard for eating like this. *munch* *munch* But gosh this is just delicious. And look - pretty milk. Must be from all the happy cows.
Monday, March 23, 2009
A Shortage Of Heroes
Disclaimer: I don't live there, I don't work there, I don't hang out there, and I haven't been there in years. I don't participate in the day-to-day goings-on there, and I can't say that I have any close friends who live there.
But geez Oakland - W.T.F.?
Granted I only "know" what I've read in newspapers and seen on news reports but damn people. Here's my version of boiling down what I "know":
On New Years Day, early in the morning, an individual started a fight on a local public transit system unit. Other individuals on that unit were concerned enough about this person's behavior that they called the police. The individual in question was more than likely intoxicated - as is not unusual on the first day of a new year. In any event, the police responded to the calls made.
The individual was found and things spun out of control - quickly. Horribly. Movements were made that, in hindsight, shouldn't have been made. Things were yelled that shouldn't have been yelled. Tempers all around flared and no one listened to what anyone was saying. Fight or flight took hold and in the midst of things, mistakes - huge, ugly mistakes - were made. Somebody died because of actions that had occurred.
Public opinion cried out for immediate justice - but justice is rarely immediate. Within hours, marches were staged and protests were arranged. Memorials for this individual were almost immediate - and that's a good thing. That's the right thing. A life was taken, no matter how or why, and those that needed to be held accountable - ultimately - ARE being tried in a court of law.
Three months goes by.
Another individual - desperate and feeling hopeless ... lost ... trapped ... makes a simple mistake and is stopped by a well-intentioned police officer who has no idea, at first, of the history of the person he has stopped. Things spin out of control - quickly. Horribly. Movements were made that, in hindsight, shouldn't have been made.
And hours later, after the hopeless, lost, trapped person bolted and ran, and after the SWAT team was brought in, three officers lay dead and a forth is kept on life support so that, in his final hours, his family can allow doctors to transplant his organs to other people in need ... a final act of giving back.
In the light of day today, more tributes have occurred but Oakland ... you've spoken already. In the hours as the news came in, four lonely votive candles were placed in honor of your fallen heroes. No huge mounds of flowers. No stuffed animals. No photos. No protests. No memorials. It is as though Oakland has given up on itself. Their leaders have been a joke in other towns for years. Their streets have been ignored and turned over to the bold and careless who use it to troll for new victims. Their neighbors are in fear and don't have enough locks or weapons to provide comfort. Their children have no respect for others ... or for themselves. They are a proud community but they've precious little to be proud of. They've lost your way.
This could be any town in any state, really. And before ya' say "not mine", consider that EVERY community has "that area" where the desperate and forgotten have time to seethe over their pasts and decide on their futures. For every town where the "haves" live, there is a place for the "have nots".
For today - all eyes are on Oakland. What the community decides to do - how this community reacts - especially this week - will probably shape this town for years.
As I see it, Oakland has a shortage of heroes. They need to start the process of rescuing and of being respectful of themselves. They will either pull together as a people, or they will pull themselves apart. They have proven they are tough as individuals. I hope they can see the benefits of working together - as a community - towards a brighter and safer future.
But geez Oakland - W.T.F.?
Granted I only "know" what I've read in newspapers and seen on news reports but damn people. Here's my version of boiling down what I "know":
On New Years Day, early in the morning, an individual started a fight on a local public transit system unit. Other individuals on that unit were concerned enough about this person's behavior that they called the police. The individual in question was more than likely intoxicated - as is not unusual on the first day of a new year. In any event, the police responded to the calls made.
The individual was found and things spun out of control - quickly. Horribly. Movements were made that, in hindsight, shouldn't have been made. Things were yelled that shouldn't have been yelled. Tempers all around flared and no one listened to what anyone was saying. Fight or flight took hold and in the midst of things, mistakes - huge, ugly mistakes - were made. Somebody died because of actions that had occurred.
Public opinion cried out for immediate justice - but justice is rarely immediate. Within hours, marches were staged and protests were arranged. Memorials for this individual were almost immediate - and that's a good thing. That's the right thing. A life was taken, no matter how or why, and those that needed to be held accountable - ultimately - ARE being tried in a court of law.
Three months goes by.
Another individual - desperate and feeling hopeless ... lost ... trapped ... makes a simple mistake and is stopped by a well-intentioned police officer who has no idea, at first, of the history of the person he has stopped. Things spin out of control - quickly. Horribly. Movements were made that, in hindsight, shouldn't have been made.
And hours later, after the hopeless, lost, trapped person bolted and ran, and after the SWAT team was brought in, three officers lay dead and a forth is kept on life support so that, in his final hours, his family can allow doctors to transplant his organs to other people in need ... a final act of giving back.
In the light of day today, more tributes have occurred but Oakland ... you've spoken already. In the hours as the news came in, four lonely votive candles were placed in honor of your fallen heroes. No huge mounds of flowers. No stuffed animals. No photos. No protests. No memorials. It is as though Oakland has given up on itself. Their leaders have been a joke in other towns for years. Their streets have been ignored and turned over to the bold and careless who use it to troll for new victims. Their neighbors are in fear and don't have enough locks or weapons to provide comfort. Their children have no respect for others ... or for themselves. They are a proud community but they've precious little to be proud of. They've lost your way.
This could be any town in any state, really. And before ya' say "not mine", consider that EVERY community has "that area" where the desperate and forgotten have time to seethe over their pasts and decide on their futures. For every town where the "haves" live, there is a place for the "have nots".
For today - all eyes are on Oakland. What the community decides to do - how this community reacts - especially this week - will probably shape this town for years.
As I see it, Oakland has a shortage of heroes. They need to start the process of rescuing and of being respectful of themselves. They will either pull together as a people, or they will pull themselves apart. They have proven they are tough as individuals. I hope they can see the benefits of working together - as a community - towards a brighter and safer future.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Now Playing At An Office Near You
Me: So we gonna turn on the game(s) today then?
Male Co-worker: Sure - what time is kick-off?
Me: Uhhhh - it's basketball. Kicking is ... well, it's kinda frowned upon, yanno?
**********
Me: I know - me and skydiving ... how wrong is that? And ya' know what else? It was through a professional org and helmets were NOT part of the equipment we were issued to wear.
Female Co-worker: Uh huh. And how did you get that latest bruise again?
Me: I was changing out a battery in the smoke alarm and fell off the edge of the bed.
Female Co-worker: And you've broken your arms how many times?
Me: Twice. Each one.
Female Co-worker: And the last time you twisted your ankle ...
Me: ... happened as I was getting down from sitting on a kitchen stool.
Female Co-worker: You ... you maybe should wear a life helmet.
**********
Shipping Department Employee: Hey -you got a nice little package.
Pause
Awkward pause
Additional awkward pause
Shipping Department Employee: I'm gonna call you back and try that again, ok?
**********
My usually very together boss: Can you loan me some cash? I drove in without my bag today.
Me: Sure - so that means you don't have your license then either right?
My usually very together boss: Oh. Damn. Yeah.
Me: And your cell phone is ... ?
My usually very together boss: In ... my ... bag.
Me: With your laptop. Don't you carry that in your bag?
My usually very together boss: I'm - yeah, I'm going home now.
Me: Here's some cash - in case you get pulled over or get into trouble.
My usually very together boss: Clearly I'm already in trouble.
**********
I freely admit to writing these down for the manuscript that will eventually become a musical.
Male Co-worker: Sure - what time is kick-off?
Me: Uhhhh - it's basketball. Kicking is ... well, it's kinda frowned upon, yanno?
**********
Me: I know - me and skydiving ... how wrong is that? And ya' know what else? It was through a professional org and helmets were NOT part of the equipment we were issued to wear.
Female Co-worker: Uh huh. And how did you get that latest bruise again?
Me: I was changing out a battery in the smoke alarm and fell off the edge of the bed.
Female Co-worker: And you've broken your arms how many times?
Me: Twice. Each one.
Female Co-worker: And the last time you twisted your ankle ...
Me: ... happened as I was getting down from sitting on a kitchen stool.
Female Co-worker: You ... you maybe should wear a life helmet.
**********
Shipping Department Employee: Hey -you got a nice little package.
Pause
Awkward pause
Additional awkward pause
Shipping Department Employee: I'm gonna call you back and try that again, ok?
**********
My usually very together boss: Can you loan me some cash? I drove in without my bag today.
Me: Sure - so that means you don't have your license then either right?
My usually very together boss: Oh. Damn. Yeah.
Me: And your cell phone is ... ?
My usually very together boss: In ... my ... bag.
Me: With your laptop. Don't you carry that in your bag?
My usually very together boss: I'm - yeah, I'm going home now.
Me: Here's some cash - in case you get pulled over or get into trouble.
My usually very together boss: Clearly I'm already in trouble.
**********
I freely admit to writing these down for the manuscript that will eventually become a musical.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
My fuzzy-faced guy.
Most of the time, my ramblings here are pretty general, which is completely intentional. Over the past year, there have been a few exceptions ... but, then again, this is my space and I'll scribble on the walls as I see fit. Anyway, today will be specific. And personal. And happy. Wonderful, in fact.
He's been in my life for quite a while, and has been a remarkable friend. Unwavering. Stable. Warm. Calming. Strong. Not terribly needy. Makes me laugh. Sits with me when I'm down. Helps me when I'm not feeling well. AMAZING listener. Has a great playful side. Handsome. Charming. Graceful. Very very caring. And has a voice that makes me smile. Sometimes is goofy for no reason at all. And has the good sense to tolerate the indoor/outdoor cat without complaint.
Happy Birthday to my wonderful wonderful guy.
(he does have tuna-breath tho ...)
He's been in my life for quite a while, and has been a remarkable friend. Unwavering. Stable. Warm. Calming. Strong. Not terribly needy. Makes me laugh. Sits with me when I'm down. Helps me when I'm not feeling well. AMAZING listener. Has a great playful side. Handsome. Charming. Graceful. Very very caring. And has a voice that makes me smile. Sometimes is goofy for no reason at all. And has the good sense to tolerate the indoor/outdoor cat without complaint.
Happy Birthday to my wonderful wonderful guy.
(he does have tuna-breath tho ...)
Thursday, March 12, 2009
"I'm a nerd, and I'm pretty proud of it"
I have a label option for these brain dumps of mine - it's a standard Blogger feature and I've created some *very specific* ones ("Classic Cars", "KitchenAid", "Scharffenberger") and some pretty general ones ("Brain Barf", "Cats", "Fun and games").
Most times, I use a very general label ... "life". I figure "life" pretty much always covers things. I don't have a "health" label - and probably never will - 'cause all things health fall under "life". If I'm getting specific, I add to it ... so "life, rant" may be me channeling Dennis Miller and "life, gratitude" will likely be me at my Polly-Annish best.
No one would argue that, more often than not, writing a blog is a very ... well bold, outgoing, ego-centric kind of thing to do. Pre-blogs, we had diaries or journals (some of us still do) and those were typically private. (My first diary had a lock that, apparently, was useless ... but then, it's not like I'd written anything that private anyway. I knew my sister would read it.) But blogs are - for the most part - public domain.
I'm getting to the point ... be patient.
I have one label I haven't used much ... "Guilty Pleasure Shows". Given my sparse TV watching habits, it makes sense that this hasn't been used much. But, in the interest of using it and, with this being a blog and not a diary, here we go ...
Last weekend, there was a movie being shown on TV that is on my guilty pleasure movie list and I had to watch it. Had to. I love the music. I love the storyline. I love the stupid, extremely predictable dialogue and the oh-so-very-dated soundtrack (filled with songs that I'm also admitting to knowing most the lyrics to). I love the beyond-obvious outcome and resolution to the film. I sat there - transfixed - the moment I saw the familiar face of one of the main characters (an actor who probably wishes he'd never done the film) and hardly moved until the final copyright line scrolled beyond the screen.
Yes ... last weekend, I gleefully and happily spent 90 minutes of my life watching "Revenge of the Nerds" ... and I'm pretty proud of it.
Most times, I use a very general label ... "life". I figure "life" pretty much always covers things. I don't have a "health" label - and probably never will - 'cause all things health fall under "life". If I'm getting specific, I add to it ... so "life, rant" may be me channeling Dennis Miller and "life, gratitude" will likely be me at my Polly-Annish best.
No one would argue that, more often than not, writing a blog is a very ... well bold, outgoing, ego-centric kind of thing to do. Pre-blogs, we had diaries or journals (some of us still do) and those were typically private. (My first diary had a lock that, apparently, was useless ... but then, it's not like I'd written anything that private anyway. I knew my sister would read it.) But blogs are - for the most part - public domain.
I'm getting to the point ... be patient.
I have one label I haven't used much ... "Guilty Pleasure Shows". Given my sparse TV watching habits, it makes sense that this hasn't been used much. But, in the interest of using it and, with this being a blog and not a diary, here we go ...
Last weekend, there was a movie being shown on TV that is on my guilty pleasure movie list and I had to watch it. Had to. I love the music. I love the storyline. I love the stupid, extremely predictable dialogue and the oh-so-very-dated soundtrack (filled with songs that I'm also admitting to knowing most the lyrics to). I love the beyond-obvious outcome and resolution to the film. I sat there - transfixed - the moment I saw the familiar face of one of the main characters (an actor who probably wishes he'd never done the film) and hardly moved until the final copyright line scrolled beyond the screen.
Yes ... last weekend, I gleefully and happily spent 90 minutes of my life watching "Revenge of the Nerds" ... and I'm pretty proud of it.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
"Yes, I'm crabby, but it's not my fault."
(Alternate titles ... "Sign Of The Times", "Time Of The Month", "Of Course I'm Crabby")
I heard the mother of all excuses today. I was waiting in line and I heard the following:
"Oh, it wasn't a diet really - I just stopped all the snacking. Which was difficult because, yanno, all Scorpios are nibblers."
It was all I could do not to turn around and laugh out loud. I've shared this new way of not accepting blame for our own weaknesses with two coworkers, and we've all decided that from here on out, we're just innocent victims of our astrological signs.
"I'm not disorganized, I'm a Virgo."
"Oh, no - I just drive like that because I'm a Gemini."
Seriously - I can't wait to start using this on a regular basis. In fact, I'm gonna go share this with my guy ... 'cause, ya' know, I'm a Cancer - and sharing is what we do.
I heard the mother of all excuses today. I was waiting in line and I heard the following:
"Oh, it wasn't a diet really - I just stopped all the snacking. Which was difficult because, yanno, all Scorpios are nibblers."
It was all I could do not to turn around and laugh out loud. I've shared this new way of not accepting blame for our own weaknesses with two coworkers, and we've all decided that from here on out, we're just innocent victims of our astrological signs.
"I'm not disorganized, I'm a Virgo."
"Oh, no - I just drive like that because I'm a Gemini."
Seriously - I can't wait to start using this on a regular basis. In fact, I'm gonna go share this with my guy ... 'cause, ya' know, I'm a Cancer - and sharing is what we do.
Monday, March 9, 2009
"Because We Can"
Here's what I don't get ...
I consistently cook a damn good risotto in 24 minutes.
Contrary to what some authors and chefs would have you believe, you do not need a specific pot to cook risotto in ('tho I have one, which hangs on my wall in the kitchen, 'cause it's pretty and shiny), you do not need a specific spoon with which to stir the risotto, you do not need to stir the risotto un-endingly, *and* I don't think I could make it a longer process than the aforementioned 24 minutes. Honest - that 24 minutes is really as long as I could stretch things out - and that includes preheating the broth prior to adding it into the aborio rice. (The only hard and fast rule that the cookbooks and I agree on is that risotto is made with aborio rice. I've even cheated before and not preheated the broth and the results were still a very lovely risotto - creamy and tasty.)
So I guess when I read about the various cheats available that remove the unending stirring, the 45 minute cooking time, etc - I wonder - why? Why would I change to a process that takes "only" 30 minutes when that would ADD time to my current process? Isn't that the same as someone advising me to an "easier" commute that adds 12 minutes to my current time? Is it that far off to changing to a newer, revised product simply because such an item is available, even if the now older product worked just fine? Am I cheating myself out of a "better experience" if I continue to use a cell phone that is more than a decade old? One of my cars was made more than 10 years ago ... as long as the safety measures and the ecology still measures up against today's standards, am I being somehow untrue by not rushing out to upgrade immediately?
"New and improved" can make a person wonder if what they have is now somehow "old and inferior" simply by the label. And, while our economy could use the boost of thousands of Americans rushing out to buy the latest model vehicle (with "new and improved" cup holders), I guess I'm of the mindset that the value is in the eye of the beholder.
As an example, I present the following:
Oh and PS ... Johnny Galecki is a hottie.
I consistently cook a damn good risotto in 24 minutes.
Contrary to what some authors and chefs would have you believe, you do not need a specific pot to cook risotto in ('tho I have one, which hangs on my wall in the kitchen, 'cause it's pretty and shiny), you do not need a specific spoon with which to stir the risotto, you do not need to stir the risotto un-endingly, *and* I don't think I could make it a longer process than the aforementioned 24 minutes. Honest - that 24 minutes is really as long as I could stretch things out - and that includes preheating the broth prior to adding it into the aborio rice. (The only hard and fast rule that the cookbooks and I agree on is that risotto is made with aborio rice. I've even cheated before and not preheated the broth and the results were still a very lovely risotto - creamy and tasty.)
So I guess when I read about the various cheats available that remove the unending stirring, the 45 minute cooking time, etc - I wonder - why? Why would I change to a process that takes "only" 30 minutes when that would ADD time to my current process? Isn't that the same as someone advising me to an "easier" commute that adds 12 minutes to my current time? Is it that far off to changing to a newer, revised product simply because such an item is available, even if the now older product worked just fine? Am I cheating myself out of a "better experience" if I continue to use a cell phone that is more than a decade old? One of my cars was made more than 10 years ago ... as long as the safety measures and the ecology still measures up against today's standards, am I being somehow untrue by not rushing out to upgrade immediately?
"New and improved" can make a person wonder if what they have is now somehow "old and inferior" simply by the label. And, while our economy could use the boost of thousands of Americans rushing out to buy the latest model vehicle (with "new and improved" cup holders), I guess I'm of the mindset that the value is in the eye of the beholder.
As an example, I present the following:
Oh and PS ... Johnny Galecki is a hottie.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
"Everything's Amazing. Nobody's happy."
I have worked in the technology sector for a loooooooooong time - either selling it, or helping to sell it, or promoting it or designing it but always ... always ... using it.
Technology makes our lives so much easier ... annnnnd sooooo much harder. E-mail is a marvelous tool and a terrible interruption. Microwaves - which can warm whole meals in seconds take too long. A laptop that takes more than 2 minutes to start is useless. Cellular phones are garbage if they don't also take photos and allow us to access the Internet so that we can read the New York Stock Exchange - LIVE - FROM NEW YORK. Have we forgotten how completely amazing some of these things are?
Everything is amazing. Nobody is happy.
(And - VERY ironically - I'm unable to embed the clip directly into this blog entry, because that feature has been disabled. But do take the four whole minutes to watch - you can microwave a meal at the same time, if you must.)
Technology makes our lives so much easier ... annnnnd sooooo much harder. E-mail is a marvelous tool and a terrible interruption. Microwaves - which can warm whole meals in seconds take too long. A laptop that takes more than 2 minutes to start is useless. Cellular phones are garbage if they don't also take photos and allow us to access the Internet so that we can read the New York Stock Exchange - LIVE - FROM NEW YORK. Have we forgotten how completely amazing some of these things are?
Everything is amazing. Nobody is happy.
(And - VERY ironically - I'm unable to embed the clip directly into this blog entry, because that feature has been disabled. But do take the four whole minutes to watch - you can microwave a meal at the same time, if you must.)
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
... In Which I'm Introduced By My Boss.
I was driving this morning, while it was pouring rain. I actually enjoy my commute, even when it's not so nice out. I was pondering all that I'd do today, the things that I'd accomplish, and just general "life" things. (Feel free to read this as "day dreaming about my guy and other mooshie stuff".)
Towards the end of my drive, I found myself having to change lanes from the middle lane to the lane to the right. Typically I'd use my blinker but, as there was no one behind me, I decided to just see if there was space for me in the right lane. There was a red and white Mini in that lane with juuuuust enough space between us that I could *probably* cut in, but I decided against it. Since there was no one behind me, I slowed down. The Mini also slowed just a bit, due to stopped traffic ahead. At this point, I turned on my blinker and came to a total stop. (Again - no one was behind me so it was alright.) I will admit that while I did this, I may have participated in a few not-so-nice ideas about the driver of this Mini, who had now caused me to lose all of about 2 seconds of my "nice commute". Funny how quickly one can become indignant, isn't it?
In any event, I found myself 2 cars behind the Mini as we all turned right - and then directly behind the Mini about a block later. When we both turned into the same parking lot, I noticed that the Mini was having - or WOULD be having - muffler trouble soon. The exhaust manifold which in this car leads from underneath the engine block down the length of the car and out the tailpipe had lost a bracket - and was hanging dangerously close to the pavement. I decided that, as we were now "parking lot buddies", I'd do this person a favor and let them know about their automotive malfunction before it became a problem. I *could* have ranted and raved about the whole "not letting me cut in" thing too but really - no harm was done.
I will point out that I decided to go the "nice" route BEFORE the driver of the Mini got out ... BEFORE I realized the driver of the Mini is my boss.
So I told her to get her exhaust manifold checked the next time her car was up on the rack, and she thanked me for providing her a car maintenance warning. She also said it'd be good for me to attend the all-staff meeting in 30 minutes, since she'd be introducing me. (This was the same meeting I'd decided while getting dressed this morning that I would attend virtually, as I'm still quite sneezey from the flu *and* not really "office presentable" in my manner of dress today.)
Forty-five minutes later, she received a loud round of laughter with this introduction: "Jules comes to us via a typical route of making huge bundles of money for a company and then guilting them into giving portions of the profits to charity. Along with keeping us within our budget and making sure I know what I'm talking about before I speak, she happily provides me with emergency chocolate *and* car maintenance bulletins, for which I'm grateful. She spends her spare time as an active rabid foodie, and makes references of deep fried dill pickle slices, roasted asparagus soup and everything in-between. She has an attentive boyfriend that sends her flower bouquets that should be used in famous paintings. Be nice to her."
I'm thinking of hiring her to do my PR from now on.
Towards the end of my drive, I found myself having to change lanes from the middle lane to the lane to the right. Typically I'd use my blinker but, as there was no one behind me, I decided to just see if there was space for me in the right lane. There was a red and white Mini in that lane with juuuuust enough space between us that I could *probably* cut in, but I decided against it. Since there was no one behind me, I slowed down. The Mini also slowed just a bit, due to stopped traffic ahead. At this point, I turned on my blinker and came to a total stop. (Again - no one was behind me so it was alright.) I will admit that while I did this, I may have participated in a few not-so-nice ideas about the driver of this Mini, who had now caused me to lose all of about 2 seconds of my "nice commute". Funny how quickly one can become indignant, isn't it?
In any event, I found myself 2 cars behind the Mini as we all turned right - and then directly behind the Mini about a block later. When we both turned into the same parking lot, I noticed that the Mini was having - or WOULD be having - muffler trouble soon. The exhaust manifold which in this car leads from underneath the engine block down the length of the car and out the tailpipe had lost a bracket - and was hanging dangerously close to the pavement. I decided that, as we were now "parking lot buddies", I'd do this person a favor and let them know about their automotive malfunction before it became a problem. I *could* have ranted and raved about the whole "not letting me cut in" thing too but really - no harm was done.
I will point out that I decided to go the "nice" route BEFORE the driver of the Mini got out ... BEFORE I realized the driver of the Mini is my boss.
So I told her to get her exhaust manifold checked the next time her car was up on the rack, and she thanked me for providing her a car maintenance warning. She also said it'd be good for me to attend the all-staff meeting in 30 minutes, since she'd be introducing me. (This was the same meeting I'd decided while getting dressed this morning that I would attend virtually, as I'm still quite sneezey from the flu *and* not really "office presentable" in my manner of dress today.)
Forty-five minutes later, she received a loud round of laughter with this introduction: "Jules comes to us via a typical route of making huge bundles of money for a company and then guilting them into giving portions of the profits to charity. Along with keeping us within our budget and making sure I know what I'm talking about before I speak, she happily provides me with emergency chocolate *and* car maintenance bulletins, for which I'm grateful. She spends her spare time as an active rabid foodie, and makes references of deep fried dill pickle slices, roasted asparagus soup and everything in-between. She has an attentive boyfriend that sends her flower bouquets that should be used in famous paintings. Be nice to her."
I'm thinking of hiring her to do my PR from now on.
Monday, March 2, 2009
He's Got Legs. He Knows How To Use 'Em.
I wish I had some clever way to introduce this six minute act of bravery.
I do not.
Just watch ... chuckle ... shift uncomfortably in your chair ... and grit your teeth.
(which, btw, is kinda the whole point.)
I do not.
Just watch ... chuckle ... shift uncomfortably in your chair ... and grit your teeth.
(which, btw, is kinda the whole point.)
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