7 things I’ve learned in 5 days

* I'm not capable of "crying myself out". I always thought, even growing up, that there was some kind of limit on tears. Turns out, I was wrong, and - actually - I'm ok with that, 'tho I'm also ok with not conducting any further testing on the theory.

* The last time I had an adult-to-adult conversation with my parents was 25 years ago. No joke. I remember THAT conversation vividly. Since that evening, I've experienced: a failed wedding engagement; Cancer; the death of a dear friend from a disease that my parents will probably never understand; the rescuing my sister from two abusive husbands and many many other very serious situations. For whatever reasons I may have offered myself during those times, I didn't address any of these events with my parents. I felt that by not allowing them to be involved, they would not have the opportunity to let me down. I neglected to see that by not allowing them to be involved, they would not have the opportunity to support me, either.

* That second bullet point there could be said about many very important people in my life. I see it now ... and I dearly hope it is not a lesson I have learned too late, but I will allow the opportunity for support, either way.

* Because of my medical history, when I make an Urgent Care appointment on a Sunday afternoon, I'm seen first thing the next day. I will not abuse this "earned privilage", of course, but it came in REALLY handy for me this go-around.

* Sometimes you need to allow your business-life and your personal-life collide. When doing so is appropriate, you will likely learn a lot about the human beings that you work for, and with. And they will, more often than not, pleasantly surprise you. I've received more medical references in the past 4 hours from people whom I'd never expect to offer any advice, let alone personal stories.

* It's ok for me to hope that I'm allowed the opportunity to apply what I've learned over just these past few days (and what I'll continue to learn over the next months) but that's all that it can be is a "hope". I'm only 50% of this equation and the rest of that percentage is NOT for me to "create".

* It's also ok for me to admit, and BELIEVE, something I wrote awhile ago. I am not easy to get to know but ... as it turns out ... I actually *am* worth it - and it's NOT egotistical to say that. It's just that if I'm gonna ask for anyone else to support my goals or recognize my strength, I gotta see it in myself first.